“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to goal, not people or things.”
Are you happy? If your answer is yes, then great; it means you know yourself. If your answer is no, then you are unaware of yourself. If you are not happy, then ask yourself why not.
Here are a few general and simple questions for you?
Q. Can you see with your eyes?
Of course, you can.
Q. Can you hear with your ears?
Of course, you can.
Q. Can you smell with your nose?
Of course, you can.
Q. Can you taste with your tongue?
Of course, you can.
Q. Can you speak with your mouth?
Of course, you can.
Q. Can you work with your hands?
Q. Can you walk with your legs?
Of course, you can.
Q. Can you think with your brain?
Of course, you can.
I know all your answers are yes, positive and affirmative, there is no doubt about it. Now, if you are born with absolutely sound and healthy in this world, then what things are bothering you to remain unhappy in your life? Almighty God has gifted you all the wonderful organs to be happy in your life.
Many of you might say, these things will not bring happiness in life. Since, these human organs are normal at all, gifted from birth. But, here you might have forgotten that you are born in this world to be happy in your life while using all these wonderful organs (To see, to hear, to feel, to taste, to speak, to walk, to work and to think). It is in your nature from the moment you born in this world.
What does it signify to you? It only signifies to you that happiness is in your gene right from your birth. But, as long as you start living your life and attach to the materialistic world, you start forgetting your true nature of happiness. You start chasing the things; you start following the other people; you start trapping yourself in the possession of materialistic things. And hence, the more you try to chase the things, the more your true happiness flies away from you.
Is your happiness internal or external?
Let’s find out whether your happiness is internal or external.
• Whenever you see something good things or right things, you feel good, and that good feelings bring you happiness.
For instance: beautiful flowers, green trees, birds and animals.
For instance: beautiful sound and sweet songs.
• Whenever you smell something sweet and delicious thing, you feel good, and that good feelings brings you happiness.
For instance: fragrance of flowers and perfume.
• Whenever you taste something good things or right things, you feel good, and that good feelings bring you happiness.
For instance: delicious foods and sweet desserts etc.
For instance: a word of blessings; a word of good wishes; a word of appreciations; and a word of sympathies.
• Whenever you think something about good things or right things, you feel good, and that good feelings bring you happiness.
For instance: good thoughts and good ideas.
• Whenever you do something good things or the right things, you feel good, and those good feelings bring you happiness.
For instance: helping people, giving charities and working for good causes.
From the above conditions, it is obvious to you that your happiness is internal inspired by the external sources.
It is also apparent to you that you could only bring happiness in your life when you do good things or the right things. On the contrary, if you always do bad things or the wrong things in your life, then your bad deeds or wrongs deeds always bring you unhappiness in your life. In fact, your life always urges you to do good deeds or right deeds in your life no matter whatsoever happen.
In other words, your happiness depends on your Karmas. If your Karma is good, then it will bring good result for you, and good result will bring joy and happiness in your life. In the similar manner, if your Karma is bad, then it will always bring bad result for you, and bad result will always bring unhappiness and sorrows in your life.
It also clearly mentioned by Lord Buddha in his Noble Eight fold Path:
1. Right View: Understanding the nature and cause of suffering and the method of release.
2. Right Intention: Readiness to begin renouncing attachment and cultivating compassion.
3. Right Speech: Using language impeccably, avoiding lying, slander and verbal “violence.”
4. Right Action: Avoid harming ourselves and others (needless killing, stealing, sensual obsession).
5. Right Livelihood: Earning a living that honors ourselves and others.
6. Right Effort: Cultivating sincere discipline, but not over-doing it.
Cultivating the habit of gently monitoring and shaping mental content.
8. Right Meditation: Developing a practice of focused, intentional consciousness.
When you follow all the above Eight fold Paths of Lord Buddha then you will always become happy in your life.
Who will create your own happiness?
You are the creator of your own happiness as well as your own unhappiness in your life. Your happiness is the state of your own mind. It is the state which you only decide yourself. You decide yourself whether you will remain happy or unhappy. You are the decision maker. Since, there is no one in the entire world who will dare to make you happy or unhappy without your own consent.
Let us suppose that if you decide to remain happy throughout your day, then no one could ever dare to force you unhappy even there would be external pressures or any circumstances. On the other hand, if you already decide to remain unhappy, then no one would make you happy even all the external sources are favorable to you. (External sources means- your beloved ones, your spouse, your family, your friends, your neighbors, your colleagues, your job, your Boss, your house, money, name, fame etc.) Many times you might hear or read or watch in the newspaper or on TV that the famous person or famous celebrity has committed suicide for some personal reasons. What do you think that might drive them to commit such a great blunder in their lives, even though they are so successful in their professional lives? There is only one reason that is lack of happiness in their lives.
Your happiness is the integral part of your own life. Your happiness is the breath of your own life. Without happiness, you can’t live your life.
The opposite of HAPPINESS is UNHAPPINESS, just an addition of suffix word ‘UN’ in HAPPINESS.
UNHAPPINESS = UN+HAPPINESS
What does it signify? The word ‘Happiness’ itself signifies that when you are not happy then you will become ‘Unhappy’, just a mere difference of suffix word ‘Un’ in happiness.
The moment you will give up your happiness, the very moment your unhappiness and sorrows will follow in your life. In other words, your happiness and unhappiness goes hand in hand like the two sides of a same coin or like light and its shadow. You are responsible for your own happiness as well as for your unhappiness.
Do you require many zillion of things to achieve happiness in your life?
Let’s understand what his holiness Dalai Lama said, “In identifying one ’s mental state as the prime factor in achieving happiness, of course, that doesn ’t deny that our basic physical needs for food, clothing, and shelter must be met. But once these basic needs are met, the message is clear: we don’t need more money, we don’t need greater success or fame, we don’t need the perfect body or even the perfect mate- right now, at this very moment, we have a mind, which is all the basic equipment we need to achieve complete happiness.”
Is your happiness and unhappiness permanent or temporary?
In the Bhagwad Gita, Lord Krishna advised Arjuna about happiness and unhappiness when the former asked- “Arjuna, everything comes and goes in life, Happiness and unhappiness are temporary experiences that rise from sense perception. Heat and cold, pleasure and pain will come and go. They never last forever. So, do not get attached to them.”
The fact of the matter is that everything is temporary in this world; nothing is permanent in this world. But with our own good karmas we will able to make our life happy.
“If one has obedient son, a pious wife following the Vedic path and if one is satisfied with his material possessions, one is living verily in the heaven.”
Anecdote:
Once in a village lived an old man who used to complain about everything. He thought of himself as one of the most unfortunate people in the world. He always stayed gloomy and in bad mood.
Whole village was tired of him. With passing years he became more bile and used to utter more bitter words. People were so fed up of him that they avoided him. Even for people who used to be happy found it insulting to be happy next to him. Just his presence created the feeling of unhappiness in others.
But one day, an incredible thing happened. Everyone heard a rumor about the old man.
That day, some people from village went to old man asked, “What happened to you?”
The old man replied, “Nothing. For all my life I have been chasing happiness but it was useless. Today I decided to live without thinking about wanting happiness and just enjoy life. That’s why am happy.”
What is the moral of this story?
• Happiness will come to you if you stop worrying about it.
• You will never find your true happiness while chasing it.
• Give up your worries.
• Let it go.
• Accept the things which are available at the present moment.
• Never complain about anything.
• Don’t repent of anything.
• Only you can create your own fortune.
• Fill your life with love and compassion.
Can you attain happiness permanently in your life?
Well, this question arises obviously in your mind whether you could bring happiness permanently in your life or not. Here is a question for you before you get this answer- Is everything permanent in this world? I could guess that your answer is obviously no. Nothing is permanent in this world. Everything is temporary in this world. Your happiness is not permanent. But when you practice happiness in your life every day as a ritual, your happiness will never leave you.
I am happy with myself…..
I am happy with my beloved ones…..
I am happy with everybody….
I am happy because I love myself….
I am happy because everybody loves me…..
Happiness is my nature…..
It is my birthright to be happy forever…..
What happens when you always remain happy?
• You will become positive in your life.
• You will enjoy your life.
• You will always remain blissfully.
• You will become an optimist.
• You will feel energized.
• You can focus on your work.
• You will become sound and healthy.
* When a person remains happy, it improves his health. It helps him to eat healthier, more active and sleep better. Happiness leads to healthier behaviors; it helps stave off high blood pressure and excess body fat, resulting in lower risk of stroke and cardiovascular disease.
What happens when you always remain unhappy?
• You will become negative in your life.
• You will complain about everything in your life.
• You will always remain worry and tension.
• You will become a pessimist.
• You will become weak and dull.
• You will distract from your work.
• You will become prone to disease.
* When a person remains unhappy, his mental and physical health will hamper because his metabolism starts deteriorating. For instance, decreased appetite, insomnia, lack of deep sleep, or oversleeping. Unhappiness affects the lungs, the liver and the heart and may influence the functional relationship between these organs. Unhappiness induces Heart/ Liver Blood deficiency and may also impact the functions of the Uterus.
How can you become happy in your life?
Before you explore your answer to become happy in your life, let’s see the below conversation between a man and his six years old daughter in an anecdote.
“Yes, I’m happy,” the daughter replied sweetly.
“Why are you happy?”
“I don’t know, daddy. I’m just happy.”
The man didn’t get the points of his daughter.
“What makes you happy?”
“I’m happy because I love my you, daddy; I love my mummy; I love my little brother; I love my friends; I love my teachers; I love my school; I love my studies; I love playing; I love my dolls; I love my dresses; I love our pets….”the daughter explained.
“Very good,” the man said while giving a kiss to his daughter.
What conclusion can you draw from this small anecdote?
The first and foremost ingredient of your happiness is love. You ought to love your beloved ones, your parents, your spouse, your siblings, your friends, your colleagues and your Boss; your job/ profession; your workplace and your surroundings in order to become happy in your life.
Ask these ten questions to yourself: Give your answers in Yes/No (If your answer is No, then why? Explain?) 1. Do you love yourself?
Yes/No
2. Do you love your beloved ones?
Yes/No
3. Do you love your parents?
Yes/No
4. Do you love your spouse?
Yes/No
5. Do you love your siblings?
Yes/No
6. Do you love your friends?
Yes/No
7. Do you love your colleagues?
Yes/No
Yes/No
9. Do you love your job/ profession?
Yes/No
10. Do you love your surroundings?
Yes/No
Follow the following key points to become happy in your life:
• Your happiness is the state of your mind. Therefore, control your mind. • You have to make your own decision whether you would want to remain happy or unhappy in your life. Since, nobody can make you happy or unhappy without your consent.
• Understand your own likes and dislikes.
• Don’t do anything unethical thing in your life.
• Never hurt anyone.
• Give your love to every living creature.
• Forgive yourself and others.
• Forget your past and live in your present moment.
• Don’t worry too much for your future.
• Focus on your present life.
• Grow every day and every moment.
• Pray for yourself and pray for everybody.
“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”
---Dalai Lama
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